H e a r t S o n s & H e a r t D a u g h t e r s of A l l e n G i n s b e r g

N a p a l m H e a l t h S p a : R e p o r t 2 0 1 4 : A r c h i v e s E d i t i o n

ANDY CLAUSEN

Judas Talks To Jesus

You care about me, because you want think

that you care

You want me to understand like along

practicing monk who has arrived

to understand this is not an easy place

my past practices are futile

You wheel your chair around

when I ask why is it not easy?

Why? Why! You throw it back

because we are gone before we come

because youth is abused by the self

until it is too old & weak

to abuse it anymore

because the color orange is no longer

the beach ball sun bouncing around out there

the color orange is no longer the hallucinogenic fruit

of H. Bosch

IT is now the agent of the newspaper of death

WHY? why why like a wall of compassionate cynic derision

because we drink beer when we should invent systems

because we devour meat when we should think

about soy beans

because you want to make it & don’t say

you don’t know what I’m talking about

How long can you keep the golly shucks?

You want to get elected to popular office?

It doesn’t buy the first nail with me

now you want to make it before you die

The truth and transitory beauty isn’t enough for you

Whether you have contributed, you judge

but there is little change in the system

of reward and punishment

and there is so much self punishment

Just because you figured your way through

because you want something for nothing

or have added up your nothings

and come up with something

You value yourself as an artist an exceptional

someone who has touched the inner morsel

the final fighting art of what they call ego

You think you can give to knowledge happiness

You posit you will earn with rarity and brilliance

no matter your mood and mental state

so go ahead render the soft wind attributes

of an elegant heart approachable woman

of your illusive victories in your conjurings

canonize and come on for suffering pilgrims

who all can make it superior

and validate with the stuff of gold

good fortune and every body has a chance

to crack jokes and perorate and percolate

your sophistries and suppositories

of cosmic proportions

go suck the hemorrhoids and boils of the big accounts

go find some place honored and safe

go feast on candied dung

Say there was an Adam say there was an Eve

and there existed an essential male and an essential

female, well you wouldn’t being doing them any favors

they die in the urinals of San Quentin

they would rather die in the despot’s torture chamber

go head pluck on your over rehearsed

state of the art response guaranteed

The man and the woman, the woman and the man,

man man, woman woman, both have lost

the pleasure of home

The earth has become just a crash

So go head on pull your classy goes down neat wine

and dance to tunes that brainwash you

into thinking you’ve earned a future

The woman and the man are dying in laundromats

screaming in kitchens of hell

Some of them are down in coal mines

Some of them have repressed all their memories

You wanted to make a difference?

Why? What Arrogance and Youth Worship

You purport to win by losing?

You would want to win? knowing your victory

will only make things a little worse

for this planet and its billions?

Or are you still championing some

Grand Old Cause

[Originally published in NHS 2001, http://www.poetspath.com/napalm/nhs01/clausen.html.]