N a p a l m H e a l t h S p a : R e p o r t 2 0 1 2
an official letter arrived in the mail ordering me to report to Mystery Town where I had been summoned to perform urgent yet unspecified business & since I had been raised from birth to believe that obedience is a virtue, I caught the train to Mystery Town the same day I received the letter. . .when I reached my destination & got off the train, I was surprised to find that an agent of the authorities who summoned me was waiting there to meet me since I had not sent a message to acknowledge my receipt of the letter & to say when I would be coming, so the presence of the agent seemed to indicate that the authorities had developed some method of keeping me under surveillance. . .the agent was able to recognize me immediately as soon as he saw me because the letter had informed me that when I was in Mystery Town engaged upon the duties I was required to execute, I would be expected to adhere to a strictly formal dress code at all times & I had travelled in the black suit, white shirt & black tie that the authorities had designated as appropriate garb in the letter they had sent to me. . .
the agent brought me to a desk giving me a calculator, an endless list of numbers & instructions that dictated when I would add, subtract, multiply & divide, instructions that I followed to the letter since I had been trained to be an obedient boy, so I spent my time performing the necessary calculations even though the rising & falling results of my labor signified nothing I had been taught to understand. . .I remained in uniform for weeks never even loosening my tie or opening my collar since the dress code I had been given indicated that my appearance must always remain impeccable & all concessions to my own comfort were strictly forbidden & I continued to immerse myself in the meaningless task that had been assigned to me embracing it as the tedious fate I would experience so long as the authorities believed that task should be performed. . .gradually, however, I found myself questioning the virtue of obedience I had been cultivated to devote myself to since I grew weary of producing mystery numbers to profit the mystery authorities of Mystery Town, so the day came when I abandoned my desk, stripped myself free of the required uniform & painted my naked flesh in rainbow colors prepared to lead the revolution that would break the tyranny established by the mystery authorities who inhabited Mystery Town. . .